Rob's real honest as you like it blog!

Master Card add

2009-08-28T12:09:00.000-07:00

How is this for a Master Card add? (All rough in NZ $$)

Ring for Engagement $5.500
Boat Trip up the Thames $300
Horse and Coach ride $450
Hired four piece band for one hour $550

Total $6,800

Girl not even being around to see it? Priceless!

Gutted!!!

Big weekend

2009-08-24T13:48:00.000-07:00

Well after a massive weekend, i feel that i have caught up on enough sleep to create a blog!

The weekend stated when i went to see Micheal and have a few beers, well a few beers turned in to a massive night, but a very good one at that. In the morning i decided to walk home from his place which was about an hour away, but a nice walk any how.

When i got home jumped on Justintv.com and watched the last half of the All Blacks solid win by the boys!! Then shower time and off the the cricket club for some beers and watch a bit of cricket. That night started slow but then got out of control as we walked the streets looking for pubs to let us in! Home time at 5am i think it was!!! haha

Sunday i got an invite to see Micheal again up at a park where they were having a party, Loads of Brazilian food and good times!

But today was where i got hurt a little bit, when i got home there was mail for me, and it was from Lady Gaga, ahhhh, it was her signed photo and also a letter from her self to Amelia, it is sealed by a gold sticker, but i would love to see what it says, but it is for her birthday so i had better not, would not be a cool thing to do!

Also during last week i got a phone call from the hospital that i was in, and they had come back to me with a result to how and why i was feeling why i was. And it is called brokenheart syndrome; it is a very treatable thing and it is totally under control as i type this, a change of eating habits and regular bed time was and is enough to treat what i had. They asked me alot of questions, and what they have to me is that i was having the after affects of my best friends baby being still born, and the fact that i put the last nail in the coffin of the poor little man. Then moving to London and not getting jobs etc, they said that it is pretty common for it to hit people that do the big move. But what i hate is that i had no idea that is what i had, i had never herd of it at all, and it cost me a very special woman!! A woman that i love and wanted to spend the rest of my days with! These are they symptoms and i had a few of them!

A perceived tightness of the chest, similar to an anxiety attack
Stomach ache and/or loss of appetite
Partial or complete insomnia
Anger
Shock
Nostalgia
Apathy (loss of interest)
Feelings of loneliness
Feelings of hopelessness and despair
Loss of self-respect and/or self-esteem
Fatigue Nausea
The thousand-yard stare
Constant or frequent crying
A feeling of complete emptiness
In extreme cases, death

To be honest i did not believe them when they rang me up and told me, then they told me to go take a look at a website, which i did, and read the causes of the Syndrome which are, The emotional pain of losing a loved one through divorce death, moving cities or countries, being rejected in any means or fear of losing a loved one. Once more mine are in bold. I have fear of losing my grandfather while over here, moved to England and was getting rejected from jobs all the time!

Yet another thing that i wish i could explain to Amelia! :(

The day that was ment to beat all of the days..

2009-08-19T09:48:00.000-07:00

Well as blogged in the last post, i had planned to ask Amelia to be my wife. And the phone call that i got at work today was almost to hard to take as it was one part of the day that was meant to be the best of all days... This was my master plan for that day!!!

Sleep in, out of bed at 10ish and make her a nice brunch with eggs bacon hash browns the works!

Giver Amelia her gifts

Thames River Cruise 12.00 until 2.00 included a lunch and of course the boat ride.

After the boat ride, travel by Horse drawn carriage past the other side of the Thames

Horse and Carriage would have taken us to Primrose Hill

Find a spot on Primrose Hill and bring out the Picnic Basket of cheese and wine chill till dusk

Just on dusk had singer that i had hired was going to come over to us and sing 'When i see you smile' From Bic Runga, also sing her the song that i had been learning of a work mates guitar ' to make you feel my love' http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pV_Dl4EUUNU&feature=related that song.

Then boom out the ring would have come one knee and all!

Above are some of the photos of things that were mentioned. Gutted :(

I wish that i had the chance to tell her this, I miss her to much to tell, and this day would have made me the happiest person on earth,

Miss you tonnes Amelia! xoxo i wish i had told you i was not well! I miss all our days of laughing and playing around, i would give the world and a lot more to hold you once more and tell you that you the most beautiful woman! X

My poker face!!

2009-08-18T11:12:00.000-07:00

Well well well... at the start of June my first email to a star for Amelias birthday was to Bic Runga, and she came good! And second off the bat was Lady Gaga i thought hey its a long shot, but hey. And after a few months she has got back to me!!!! And she is sending out a signed photo in the next few days for Amelias birthday, so am really not to sure what to do with it? mmmmm??? She loves Gaga and Lady Gaga was good enough to help me out so i dont want to really rip either of them off?!

How real was i?

2009-08-16T07:41:00.000-07:00

Well if you are wondering what this is? It is the RING that i had brought Amelia! And i was planning on using it, and yes it is THE RING. The moment that i knew i wanted to do it was in January when the both of us were walking down the beach up at Waipu Cove. So i decided to go to a Jeweler to get a ring made, And i wanted something a little different, and that is what i came up with.

And my perfect time that i was going to ask her was a few weeks later when we were up at her favourite beach Tawharanui, but just did not have the ring! haha

And after saving hard out i finally had the cash to pay it off! And the time that i was going to ask i passed on cause it was at the Airport and it was all every emonital so i passed on that. I also almost got caught out on it casue i had to empty my pockets into a little bin thing and she was right over me!! But i had been carrying the ring where ever we went and was just waiting for that perfect moment!

Where my problem is, is that she has now gone and i am gutted as! What do i do with the ring? Each time i see it it breaks me, cause it was made just for Amelia and i was so excited to give it to her!! So what do i do with it?

And to be honest these are the songs that i want to stop listening to but cant!!! I love them cause there what i do think!

Check them out!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FWfH-mPZBRo&feature=related Is so relevant to where i am at this stage!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SGH8McmPndw Cause thats what happened!

Draining weekend

2009-08-16T07:11:00.000-07:00

Well what an emotional day that was! Moved flats, and left behind so many memories! :(. Memories that i did not want to part with, mostly of Amelia.

Friday i blacked out at work and ended up in hospital for 6 hours! But everything was cleared so tiz all good! The tough part of the whole lot was Amelia's phone call? With not to much care in the voice, and that hurt cause i love her heaps still!

Then Saturday i went to a west end show, went and saw Stomp! Was a pretty good show, with some very talented people in it! And also had a nice luch before it. Then i dont know why i did it but i brought Amelia a book for her birthday! I know that i maybe should not have done that but as soon as i saw it i knew that she would love it!

Then Sunday was the big move, as i said i was very sad to leave Kings Mews! And i never thought that i would get like that over a house!

Why has it turned out like this?

2009-08-13T23:54:00.000-07:00

Well last night i came clean to Amelia to why i was not feeling well, why i was not the normal Rob. And the reason that i did not tell her in the first place is cause i did not want her to worry about anything that was not confirmed. And i tell you the news that i have is scary. Finally when i had the guts to tell her she did not come home again or want to talk to me. And i have not had the chance to tell her until that phone call and she did not care, she just slammed me for not telling her!

Then to make things worse she found a necklace that i had made her for her birthday and she thinks that it is some other chicks!!!! WHAT!!! :(

New beginning?

2009-08-13T04:49:00.000-07:00

Well this is the first entry on my Blog! yusss.

Currently in London England, and have alot of thinking to do, Amelia the girl that i came over here with and i very much still love has left me and i am to tell you the truth gutted!

And for the first time i will reveal that i had a ring for her! And yes it was the ring! Brought it in April of this year after saving for it, and getting it custom made, spesh for her! :( Why can i not keep a woman? Or why will she not just realise that this all was just the pressures of moving to a new city and making a fresh start? ahhhh maybe i am just not meant to have anybody long term?

But it has made me rethink London and what i want to acheive over here! So am looking at a lot of tours then may well be off home!

But watch this space! And i will keep ya all up to date!